By "DocOctorok"
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With D-pad under thumb we’ve fell’d
Many dragons in our time.
So gather ’round your screens, my friends.
Let’s commemorate with rhyme.

We thrilled as Link flick’d smack upon
Aquamentus’ wimpy fuss,
And didst face down Gleeok as he cried
“All your head are belong to us!”

We journeyed with Erdrick as suddenly
A Dragonlord approaches!
Our sword didst smite him to the ground
As a combat boot to roaches.

Bahamut, Tiamat, and your ilk
No longer burn the skies.
Our light sent thee where dragons go
To finally fantasize.

Singe of the Dragon’s Lair, tho kill’d
By Dirk, daring and plucky,
Did resurrect in our living rooms
With adaptations sucky.

Dragonite, I do choose you!
(At strategic intervals.)
Your genders make me stop and ask:
Do your males have Pokeballs?

O Ridley, Ridley, what art thou Ridley?
So vaguely dragonoid.
Thou delighted us as you made chase
With Mama Sam’s wee Metroid.

Vile Ridley, when you threaten us,
Jaws snap and wings unfurl.
Hurt deep it must to keep having your ass
Handed to you by a girl.

And finally Bowser, mighty King,
Your position high and lofty,
Who would have guess’d in eight-bit days
You’d turn in to such a softie?

Tho thwarted with ease at every turn,
Thou still give us quite a thrilla.
Thou art clearly the long-lost love child
Of Gamera and Godzilla.

And now, a Dragon Blade approaches!
We face the beast again.
If we wish to lay down forty bones
For four stars out of ten.

Can this dragon face critics’ fiery wrath,
Its weaknesses laid bare?
Perhaps not, dragon, but take heart!
At least thou art not Lair.